Happy Day, my friends, for it is a day full of Life and Vigor! Look how I Capitalize all these words of Power and Glory, signifying in truth the Vitality that resides now within me! As some of the friendly readership is aware, illness consumed me for about six and thirty hours this week, ending once and for all around noontime on Friday, having begun late Wednesday night. Hurrah, though! Hurrah, indeed! I am strong and capable of lifting heavy things. In fact, I shall do just that.
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The readership knows that I drink only purified water (Incidentally, not by my own design, but not without my favor). I carried a large bottle thereof up the stairs with just one hand, and then I placed in on the cooler with just two hands! I did not even break a sweat.
To what, though, do I owe this mythic power? Why, to green tea, of course. (Well, not really, but I had to transition the thought somehow.) In the course of my pain and suffering, which I endured with steadfastness and constancy, my organs demanded that I consume something neither particularly solid nor particularly flavorful. I asked them how they felt about tea, and they agreed that such would be an excellent idea.
Throughout the course of my existence, I have not made a habit of sipping hot tea, and I have have not ever cared for iced tea, either. I still do not care for iced tea, and I do not understand it in the least, just as I do not at all understand the idea of iced coffee. Both seem to altogether defeat their respective purposes and porpoises. Here is a strange note: I cannot speak on purposes without considering the noble porpoise. This, in turn diverts me to the noble narwhal, which Science teaches us belongs to the same order as the noble porpoise: Cetacea.* Naturally, this brings us back to green tea and how it involves the true-coming of a dream.
Often I have dreamed to myself of the admirable sophistication of the archetypal green tea sipper. The green tea drinker, however, is utterly devoid of sophistication and must also be quite the masochist. For this reason I wished deeply to become a green tea sipper, but I never was able to acquire the necessary taste; therefore, I wept. Herein the dream is manifested: the taste is acquired, and now I am enjoying the green tea in considerable quantities. I am even considering establishing a daily tea-time ritual, in order that I might attain great joy therefrom. Now may a gentle yet triumphant music sound, to celebrate this most righteous development.
If only I could convince myself that I enjoy coffee, then my joy would be made complete, as long as that entails also that the multitudes join our fellowship. Peace and Health be upon you all. Good day.
*Of course I knew that, and by no means did I look it up. Please note that that my previous sentence contains irony.
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3 comments:
How is drinking green tea masochistic? I happen to enjoy it very much.
I've been trying to develop a taste for coffee as well. So far my "hot turkey" method hasn't worked. I've decided to skip creamer and sugar and go straight for blacker than the blackest black...times infinity. It doesn't really have anything to do with hot turkey, but neither does quitting something "cold turkey" have anything to do with cold turkey.
The drinking of green tea entails the sudden inundation of the mouth with a rather hot liquid, leading to pain. This is why I insist on sipping green tea.
As for coffee, I (also plunging directly into the blackest black...times infinity)have found that it tastes better on the bottom of the tongue. I insist that coffee should be sipped, as well.
Well I definitely understand the issue with the tea being too hot. I always have to wait several minutes beofre drinking it. I thought you just meant that drinking green tea in general was masochistic.
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